My Power is Made Perfect in Weakness

Everyday, I wake up and am amazed at the fact that I’m in Uganda. It still seems like a dream to me. A lot has changed about this place, yet a lot has remained the same. It’s been interesting being here and trying to see if/how God is going to fit me in all of this. My prayer daily is to be completely and one hundred percent open to where the Lord is leading me. 

I spent a lot of my time in South Africa doubting my decision to come here with an open-ended ticket. Satan was really getting in my thoughts and telling me that I wasn’t capable of handling something like this. I was scared coming to Uganda. I spent most of my flight trying to figure out a way to get out of here as fast as I could. The day after I arrived in Uganda, I wrote this in my journal: 

That feeling you get when you are completely humbled by God. When you begin to doubt Him and then He shows you why not to. My time here has been humbling and it’s only been a day and a half. I’ve had some time to sit and reflect on God today in our long four hour care ride. He wants me to open up and give all I have to Him. Don’t miss a single opportunity to serve Him or love His people.

So I’ve been clinging to these verses since I’ve been here, “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. So, I’m writing now to boast about my weaknesses. I want you to know that when it comes to being here, I’m scared out of my mind. I’ve doubted God more times than I can count. I’ve tried to come up with countless excuses as to why I shouldn’t be here. I don’t think that I’m cut out to be a missionary in Uganda. But I will gladly boast in these weaknesses, because I know God’s power will be made perfect in them. I know that when I am weak, God will make me strong. I want my time here to be a reflection of God’s power and His might. Because without Him, I am nothing. 

Simplicity

The beauty of simplicity is a very humbling experience. It’s one of those things you don’t  realize is beautiful until you’re placed right in the midst of it all. Simplicity is inspiring. It allows you to take a step back from life and reflect on the many blessings you’ve received. You become aware of the little things in life that make living just that much better, and you stand in awe at how wonderful God has perfectly planned your steps. 

There’s nothing quite like a bear hug from a little child, sitting in a woman's Bible study hearing beautiful stories of the hardships and redemption happening in other’s lives, or sitting at the top of a water tower with thirty to forty children flying kites made out of plastic bags, tree branches and yarn. 

Simplicity. It’s beautiful. It’s uplifting. It’s inspiring. It’s a blessing.

Change

God’s been stirring in my heart the past few months a need for change. A need to put the past behind me and move forward in His grace, His sovereignty, His hope and His never ending love. A need to grow more in my relationship with Him and dig deeper in His word. A need to place my full hope, faith, love, and trust solely in Him. 

I knew I needed this change long before I began planning this trip to South Africa and Uganda. God has been speaking to me through different circumstances and people, confirming in me the need to “deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (Lk.9:23). I wasn’t exactly sure how God was going to go about changing things up for me, but I had a feeling it was going to be bigger than I could imagine. 

So I find myself serving the Lord here in South Africa. A big change. No longer am I a retail associate/host/server/bartender/supervisor. No longer am I living with my family. No longer am I in the comforts of my hometown. I’m in the midst of change. I’m now living with three amazing friends. I’m waking up every morning to twelve wonderful staff women. I’m spending the day with eighty bright shining preschooler faces. I’m serving alongside two incredible, humble and God-fearing missionaries, diligently do what the Lord has asked of them. I’m experiencing change in one of the most incredible ways.

My time here is filled with laughter from watching, teaching and interacting with very tiny human beings. It’s filled with love to and from the kiddos, friends, neighbors, locals and staff. It’s filled with blessings like a beautiful sunrise in the morning, meeting new people who share their stories, and playing games around the dinner table with five fun and awesome missionaries. It’s filled with Jesus and it’s filled with change.

God’s bringing me to my knees, asking me to trust Him. Not just for the big things but the small things too. He’s teaching me to reach out to Him daily for strength. He’s telling me, He is all I need and the rest will fall into place. He’s changing me, and I am blessed.